Optimist: "The class is half full"
Pessimist: "The class is half empty"
Patent attorney: "Liquid H20 bisects an open cylindrical vessel"
http://www.stus.com/


"After fire and the wheel, it was only logical to invent the patent attorney."
http://www.cartoonstock.com/directory/P/Patent.asp


At the Patent Office. Inventor: "It's a global positioning system adapted to find the TV remote"
***
Inventor: "I invented the wheel, fire, and the bow and arrow, and then some wiseguy invented lawyers and took them all away from me. "
http://www.cartoonistgroup.com/bysubject/subject.php?sid=1637



Next day after party: "I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"
http://www.cartoonstock.com/